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      黄昏不断加深

      作者: 雷岛 2019年10月03日00:12 浏览:2 觉得不错,我要 赞赏

      ?点击音频,听今日好诗


      一种气息牵引着我。不知往哪里去
      这是黄昏,我热爱的时刻
      我曾经在这里与你相遇,交谈
      风扯着我们的衣角,没有一个固定的方向

      总是会通向你的。所有的回忆
      都是如此。所有的梦
      都无法摆脱你的影子。而春天
      总是短到来不及从书页里抬起头来

      金子越来越少。俗事越来越多
      春光啊春光,只用来感叹
      我们相遇又错过。一封信
      从时光里出发,终究还要回到时光里去

      黄昏不断加深着自己的颜色
      相爱的人,总是不断加深着各自的顾虑





      最佳点评





      黄昏总是美得让人心碎,就像一段没有结局的爱情故事,就像“相爱的人,总是不断加深着各自的顾虑”。而曾“扯着我们的衣角”的风,此刻孤单地吹着诗人。

      几千年的农耕文明,把日落而息的习性深深地融入我们的血脉与基因。因此,黄昏常与归家联系在一起。“暧暧远人村,依依墟里烟”,“牧人驱犊返,猎马带禽归”,写尽了载欣载奔的温馨。

      但是,对于有故事的人来说,黄昏的凄美与心无所依的矛盾,总会撩拨起有故事的人的回忆。此时黄昏变成了思念的时刻,古有“日暮乡关何处是”,今有此诗中的“一种气息牵引着我。不知往哪里去”,在凄清难以自持之际,人之常情自然地就会“总是会通向你的”。

      黄昏处于王国维所说的“由动之静”过程中,所以黄昏的气息是淡淡的。但这种淡,是那种“不思量,自难忘”的淡。因此这种淡又仿佛不断加深的黄昏,仿佛“才下眉头,又上心头”。似淡实深,似深而又淡,像空气一样无处不在而又看不到抓不住。这种矛盾,让诗歌具有了无限的张力。

      此诗准确抓住了黄昏的特征,以淡淡的文风举重若轻地抒写着一种“浓得化不开”的深情,情景交融,情真意切,像潺潺的流水慢慢地流入读者的心田,并且渐渐洇染开,与心灵融在了一起。

      网友点评:四不像








      经编委会评选,“四不像”(来自微信)的评论被评为最佳,他将获得300元稿费。

      同时感谢以垣城踏雪”(来自微信)、“春亮”(来自网页)为代表的

      读者的热情参与,展出其优秀点评,供大家学习参考!







      优秀点评1  

      黄昏不断加深,顾虑也在加深。在我们的生活中,总会遇到一些人,一些事,但有时我们会无所适从,“风扯着我们的衣角,没有一个固定的方向”。

      年龄和经历产生的彼此的顾虑和无所适从,又会让“我们相遇又错过”,而产生出一种难以摆脱的怀恋。对人、对流逝的时光或对错过的一段感情,都是如此,所以“所有的梦/都无法摆脱你的影子”。在日常生活中,我们用琐事填充自己的生命,而“金子越来越少”,春光逝去,徒留感叹。黄昏不断加深着自己的颜色,相爱的人,由于顾虑的加深也将背向而行,悲情的色彩也在加深。全诗语气平淡像是娓娓道来,但诗意像气息一样弥漫开来,朱光潜先生说过:“情绪的性质一部分由人的素质决定,另一部分由产生这种情绪的环境决定。”不断加深颜色的黄昏的意象,加深了诗所表达的怅惘情绪。

      网友点评:垣城踏雪






      优秀点评2  

      《黄昏不断加深》写出了诗人对曾经相遇的恋人的眷恋和内心的忧思,情感之深,思念之切,让诗人对往事无法忘怀,以致于“所有的回忆/所有的梦/都无法摆脱你的影子”。诗人被思念的“气息牵引着”,不由自主地来到当初与恋人相遇的地方,那令人难忘的黄昏时刻,让诗人忧伤的心生出无限的惋惜和感慨,“风扯着我们的衣角,虽没有一个固定的方向,总是会通向你的”。也让我们看到了诗人对爱的深切,寓景于情,诗人将情感表露无遗。然而随着日久分离,忙于俗事越来越多,也让情感日渐冲淡,诗人不由得感叹春光的流逝,相遇又错过,人终究还要回到现实中来。尾句“黄昏不断加深着自己的颜色”,直接点出主题,诗人以黄昏加深作铺垫和渲染,感叹“相爱的人,总是不断加深着各自的顾虑”,也使全诗读起来更增添了忧伤感。

      网友点评:春亮







      “每日好诗”点评网友名录

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      (以点评时间为序,排名不分先后)

      ?“每日好诗”栏目主持:王夫刚
      网友点评整理:金石开 




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